The only two things a guys needs: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it's supposed to move and doesn't, use the WD-40. If it moves and isn't supposed to, use the Duct Tape.
Me.Hmmn...Well... The usual stuff for these things... Abandoned as a child I was raised in the forest by wolves. This has its advantages and disadvantages. The good thing is that you develop an incredibly intimate connection with nature. The downside is that parent teacher interviews are a little awkward
I monitor the frozen food section of grocery stores, looking for battered fish and providing them with a home where they need fear no longer…
I was soft spoken, until I put Viagra in my lip balm...
I am currently conducting research to explain why a "drivers education" manual is available in Braille...
I like to go into catholic bookstores and ask where their non-fiction section is...
Some say that vegetarians choose their diet because they love animals too much to kill them for food. I disagree. I think it's because they have a deep rooted hatred of plants…
I used to work hatcheck at a magician's conference...Rabbits everywhere...
The bible says on the seventh day, god rested. Am I the only person who finds it slightly disturbing that 'he' gets tired?
I'm currently lobbying government to enact a law that prevents Christians from becoming born-again unless they promise not to mention it to the rest of us who got it right the first time…
At the family Christmas dinner, my mum asked me if I wanted any of grandma's stuffing...I told her, first off that's gross. Second off, why did they take grandma to a taxidermist?
I am that guy who sits in starbucks wearing fashionable black frame glasses and grimaces at a laptop in the hope that people will perceive me as a genius with a tortured soul. Never mind that I have 20-20 vision, because I need the frames to see myself at the center of the universe; or that the expression of deep concentration I exhibit to the masses is just me holding in the kind of fart that would clear a room faster than the fbi walking in on an al qaida bomb-making seminar; or that the text on my laptop is not the fifth chapter of my new novel
I am also that guy who responds to statements by holding my chin, nodding, and saying the word interesting. On low sperm count days, I will go one step further and cross my legs for the full George Plimpton effect. I get cranky around May of every year because I can no longer wear a scarf without looking like a total nincompoop
I really should say something profound here but how can anyone summarize his or her entire existence in a paragraph? Well, I'm a easing going, sincere, intelligent man with a great sense of adventure. People say that I'm very humorous. I love a good conversation and would like to meet the same qualities in another person. I'm not looking for any specific traits or attributes. I'm still skeptical about pursuing anyone on here, and likely, I won't even make first contact. I'm generally not that guy but on occasion I may. I don't want to set any great expectations, because it just raises the platform from which to fall. It'll happen when and how it happens. I'm pretty open, so feel free to contact me.... I'm witty, confident, happy, and optimistic. I've got a sense of humor that's hard to describe, but I always am laughing, smiling and joking. Please don't try to make me take life seriously, I like living life to the fullest
w w w . m y s p a c e . c o m / f r i e n d m a r k e r
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